Sunday, November 16, 2008

Random thoughts...

...in no particular order:
  • I'm not easily offended. I have always welcomed discussion and differing opinions here, even though it's my blog. I am not really sure if I am offended or if my feelings are just hurt, but even after 2+ years of blogging about so many random things and having both positive and negative responses to all different subjects, somehow my heart just hasn't gotten used to the mean-spirited or accusatory comments.
  • Writing is a difficult task. Writing well is even worse...I know because I am not the best writer of all time. Trying to convey the truly random thoughts that race through my heart and mind on any one given day is why some days I don't write ANYTHING. And when I do, I know that my tone, facial expressions, body language and eye contact is not available to the reader. That frustrates me because if you don't know me personally, 'you' are able to judge me...however 'you' see fit...
  • I know that a blog by the mom of a dead kid is not a fun place to frequent. Of course this place was more exciting when Noah was alive, in the hospital...mystery, expectancy, the unknown...if I were continuing the blog for the purpose of gaining readers or being popular, I could have kept Noah on life support longer...BUT I'm not a freaking sicko...BUT BELIEVE ME, this isn't why I wanted a blog...Jason tried to get me to blog long ago when Em was our only child...now she's our only child, but not out of choice...
  • I cried myself to sleep on Friday night after reading some comments. I'm not writing that so anyone feels sorry for me. I was sad because I was blown away by how one person's biased interpretation of what I write at any given time can be skewed to look like something I hadn't intended. I was frustrated because if I had printed this post one or two years ago, no one would be trying to burn me over the coals as referring to O. It would have just been a post about the end times...what it was intended to be...
  • Like I said here, I don't think O is the anti-Christ. Why people want me to state one way or the other is beyond me. Yes, I have freedom of speech and I exercise it. I am grateful for that. But I don't know who THE anti-Christ is. I know WHO Christ is...
  • I cried myself to sleep on Saturday night because I was nauseated over the inadequacies of modern medicine and its shortcomings in saving my beautiful son.
  • I have heard people mock and say slanderous things against O. I have cut them off and said it wasn't cool. I have encouraged them that our job is to pray for him and his family.
  • Being passionate about something and being mean-spirited are two different things. My friends, family and people who know me know I am not mean-spirited.
  • I will not rally behind ANY man except JESUS CHRIST, MY LORD AND THE SAVIOUR OF MY SOUL, THE SON OF GOD! HE is EVERYTHING to me!
  • Really, I'm annoyed it's an election year so anything Biblical that I write about (or anyone else who does, for that matter) is going to be viewed through politically biased glasses by some, no matter what it is.
  • I'm going to continue to seek the Lord with my whole heart and I am not ashamed of it. His word says I will find Him when I seek Him with all my heart...as I read and seek Him, I will share my heart here...on my blog.

30 comments:

  1. Ade, I am so sorry that comments on your own blog have caused you tears and pain. I don't know why some people find it so hard to agree to disagree. We may not all have the same views politically, but we are all His children and should be kind to one another.

    I'm sending you a cyber hug :)

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  2. I've been coming here since October after Noah was admitted to the hospital. I can't even remember how I got here now, but I do know this...your love for the LORD, your family and those of us who read your blog is obvious in the words your write. You are concerned that others know your LORD and that's something you will be persecuted for. It doesn't seem fair, but Christ suffered so much more and He said we would also go through persecution and suffering. That perspective always gives me a reason to praise the LORD who is the lifter of my (your)head.

    Politics is always a heated subject and especially now. Some just don't know how to express themselves without spewing hate. I'm sorry you took the brunt of that. Many people feel the way you do and aren't brave enough to express it for obvious reasons.

    Thank you for your boldness. You are an inspiration. Sorry I haven't encouraged you much before now. You are my sister in Christ and I love you.

    Renee

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  3. I love how passionate you are. whatever the subject.

    I'd take somebody lit on fire about SOMETHING than luke warm about everything...

    xoxo

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  4. Dear Ade,

    To be honest with you I have been worried about how your heart would take some of the comments that I have read here lately.

    I am sorry that some people have been bitter towards you, One comment that I read I wanted to visit their blog to see what kind of person could be so bitter... they only had a google account... no blog.

    I hope these people that are sharing their opinions in a bitter way just calm down.

    You know how much I think of your blog. :)Please don't let them keep you from writing whats on your heart.

    I love you,
    Carly x

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  5. Your a brave woman to put your heart here for others to look at, its thier problem if they cant see truth staring them in the face. They have to answer for thier unkindness just as we have to answer for the things that we do. May He bring you peace today and for all the days to come.

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  6. I love you sweet friend!

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  7. I want to apologize for any of your tears that I may have caused - I truly tried to vocalize my unwavering support as well as my confusion over the meaning of the post. I want to THANK YOU for the response that you gave me - it lifted my heart in ways you will never know! Hope that you are feeling better today!

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  8. It is your blog, if people cannot respect that everybody has the right to their own opinion they shouldn't read. Or if they do at least recognize they should start their own blog for their nasty opinions or comments. Keep it up girl, dont let them get you down. They win that way!!

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  9. Annie9:54 AM

    Dani- So you're saying we should never read anything that differs from our own thoughts, beliefs, opinions? Or that we shouldn't make statements to try to clarify what the author was intending?

    Adrienne... I love your blog, love everything you have to share. Please continue to share your heart with us, even if there are some dissenters from time to time.

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  10. Glad you wrote this. I think it's good for people to know that while you do not live to please man, cunning words still hurt.

    I would like to point out that it is important to be slow to speak. We are to confront with love that comes from a Biblical perspective.

    Dani wrote ... if people CANNOT RESPECT that everybody has the right to THEIR OWN OPINION, they shouldn't read. Or create a blog for their own NASTY thoughts or opinions.

    Be slow to speak, otherwise you might very well take things out of context. And that, in turn, creates hurt feelings and a desire to defend.

    Do you see, from Annie's comment, how easily words can be skewed?

    I know Adrienne well enough to know that she would WELCOME requests for CLARIFICATION.

    Sorry to put words in your mouth Ade. :-)

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  11. Anonymous11:58 AM

    Ade, Good grief, I read the previous post and I don't feel that you were intending to refer to anyone! You were writing your thoughts, and they were provoking thoughts by the way. Please don't let the meanies on the web discourage you from posting. I love reading your thoughts! And for those who don't, they don't have to read. Love you Adrienne! ~ Jenny Freyta

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  12. Gretchen P1:01 PM

    Sorry I accidentally posted this unser a different post:
    Adrienne, unfortunatley when we put our lives out in the open on the web for all to see we are sometimes faced with the evils of the world. I stumbled upon your blog about 2 months ago and do not know you, but what I do know is you are a kind, passionate and honest woman who loves the Lord and your family. That is something NOONE can take from you. You own this blog and it is your life's journey with God, Noah, Em and Jason.....a journey that none of us are worthy of judging. I want you to know I think you are amazing for blogging what you have and continuing to speak your thoughts no matter what the cost, as a true Christian does. Keep up the good work and I pray that God sheilds you from the evils tongues of others!

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  13. This comment is really more for your readers and not you...HOLY CRAP GUYS...last I checked, this was HER blog and she can darn well write ANYTHING she wants to in this space without having ANYONE judge her, criticize her, etc. If you don't like what you read.......FIND THE NEXT WEB PAGE!!!!!! SERIOUSLY PEOPLE - get a life, or at least...a blog of your OWN!!!!!!!! The nerve of some people! If for one second I read someone's thoughts that were on their mind and heart and I disagreed, I would NEVER comment them with such harshness. Does God do that to you? Because I am 100% sure that he dislikes most of the things you do or think sometimes and he does not "send you nasty comments" does He? No!!!!!!! Again, you don't like to read another person's thoughts....FIND ANOTHER WEB PAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  14. Keep on truckin'. I love your blog, your candid random thoughts and your passion for God.

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  15. Anonymous5:54 PM

    Just so everyone understands.......God is definitely involved in EVERYTHING...not just church or the spiritual aspect of life. He created everything....every aspect of everything. Governments are not something that only natural man can control. God gave laws about how those things should be handled, too. When man doesn't handle it the way God said it should be done, He will turn man over to his own way of doing things until he gags himself on it. Unfortunately, even people who want to do things God's way have to live with the results of man's wrong way of doing things when God turns them over to their own self-driven, human-logic ways.

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  16. I rarely comment but have wanted to all day on this topic. In no way does Adrienne need me to defend her, and just to clarify so that nothing gets mis-read...this is not an angry comment, just my sincere two cents in the form of many run on sentences!

    I know that a lot of you don't know Adrienne so I thought that I would speak as someone who does.

    All opinions, perspectives, and "how I took it/how it sounds" aside...if she said she didn't mean something, she didn't. It's just that simple :) I have known her long enough to feel confident in saying that she is a very honest person and welcomes respectful dialogue.

    I know that blogs can be taken many different ways because like Adrienne pointed out, it lacks eye contact and tone and such. So, for those of you that have never had the joy to sit with her during both fun conversations and tough ones I can tell you that she is truthful and genuine. I think Erin would agree :)

    All that to say, Adrienne is truthful, so take her at her word and what I tell the little ones I take care of almost daily,
    "I don't care if she took your barbie dress from you, you still need to use kind words" ;)

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  17. I'm not sure why you said that "This place was more exciting when Noah was alive, in the hospital..." I sincerely hope that nobody outright said OR implied anything mean-spirited towards that whole situation. (I didn't interpret any of the comments as such, but you may have seen something I didn't.) That would just be over the top. Politics are one thing, and they sure as hell don't have anything to do with Noah. :/

    Similarly, I am glad that you do not blog in order to be popular. It's just no fun reading about how much @$$ kissing someone can do in order to gain readers. It is very interesting to read about other people's real thoughts and opinions.

    I hope that my comment did not offend you. I must explain that I am a very blunt person and understandably, some people take that as rudeness. Yes, I did assume that you were talking about Obama. But I was also trying to encourage you to speak your mind, regardless of what is on it. I did not want you to feel censored or afraid to express your ideas, because this is your blog. I totally agree with the philosophy that if someone doesn't like what you write, they are welcome to go elsewhere. I just cringe when I see people (in general, not saying you did or didn't) back down from one of their ideas just because other people get upset. That's why they call them opinions, not facts! Everybody is entitled to them! :)

    Signed,
    An ultra-liberal freak who has some very unpopular ideas of her own. (I left my web page this time just in case anyone needs any proof of that ;) )

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  18. I have loved reading your blog and I stumbled upon it about a year ago. Your journey has inspired me in so many ways.

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  19. Anonymous8:31 PM

    First I would like to say that I do enjoy coming to the blog of a mom who's son died. I enjoy it because I have grown to love you and always appreciate what you have to say. It always amazes me how what you have to say coincides with what I have been studying, hearing at church or feel the Lord has been speaking to me. It only confirms for me that your relationship with the Lord is real and right on. Second, you are not a mean spirited person. I have only met you once nut could tell that from hearing your voice, seeing your expressions and looking into your eyes. And third it is a shame that because it's an election year anything said about faith becomes political. People will turn ANYTHING into something political right now. Example: I went to a news station web site to find out about the So. Cal fires and happened to look at some of the comments there. People were saying that the fires were God's wrath on CA for voting yes on prop. 8. It amazed me that people could turn someone elses tragedy into a platform to voice their own political agenda. I know you already know this, but don't take other's comments personal. I will continue to look forward to all of your posts as I love to see how God continues to use you and your family. You are an encouragment!

    A friend in California and mom of Erin, Kyle, and Ty

    P.S. Kyle still thinks of Em and wonders how she's doing.

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  20. I think it's terrible that you have shed tears over the unthoughtful words of someone else. I also wonder why someone who doesn't love God would read your blog...I think that's great that they do and it may be because they really are drawn to the TRUTH. I for one, wouldn't ever desire to read an anti-Christian blog because I have no desire to read things that go against God's truth. Just thinking out loud here I guess... I hope you continue with your heartfelt posts. :) The world is full of people who need God's grace...and we must love them despite their actions and words.

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  21. We have two totally different blogs, but unfortunately they fall into the same sad category. While I occasionally stop by my own to dust off the cobwebs, I love what yours has become! Keep doing what you do! ;)

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  22. I have been following your blog for months now have have been touched deeply by what you have gone through and your insights that you share on your blog. Please do not let a thoughtless commenters (is that a word??) stifle what you write. As you and others have said it is YOUR blog. I will admit I did vote for Obama in the election but when I read your post I took no offense to what your wrote. Don't let others make you second guess what you write. Just continue to let God guide and lead you.

    Your sister in Christ.
    Leslie from Oregon

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  23. Robin, some people like to read about different views and philosophies. It's a good way for people to learn about (and better understand) others. I think the world is a much better place when everyone respects everyone else's differences. (This does not mean everyone has to agree! There would be no fun in that :) )

    I know that when I'm sitting in front of something that challenges my own beliefs or downright contradicts them, I am usually fascinated. I enjoy seeing another perspective :)

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  24. Oh man, I'm so sorry that your having a hard time with the comments on here. I don't know why people have to be so mean!
    I love coming on here and checking in on you all and hearing the new stories of Em. That and you are a true, honest person who loves the Lord with all your heart and more if that is possible.

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  25. moonlitcrystal

    I hope you don't draw conclusions about me or judge me when you don't know me as a person. As I said, "I" would not want to read material that is "anti-christian". For someone who is not a believer in Christ, it is very hard for them to understand this. The Bible says that God should be the biggest part of my life and I believe in the Bible. God is at the center of my whole world...I would be nothing without the sacrifice of Jesus Christ on the cross. I don't separate God from anything, whether it be my political views etc... There is nothing without God. Unbelievers do not understand this so I do not try to explain it... it's just something that is understood in the fellowship of believers and something I hold true to in my own heart. That said, it hurts my heart greatly to hear people say things about God or against God that are not true. It hurts my heart when I read words that are mocking God or His word. I do not desire to read things that are anti-God or therefore considered, anti-Christian. I love God with all my heart, mind, soul and strength...Just as it would hurt me to read things written against my children or someone I love dearly, for example, so it would hurt me to read things against my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. People can me label as they will...I am not judging others by this decision, I am simply honoring my God and my relationship with Him. He is deserving of my honor and devotion...He is such a good and loving God and I am thankful that He loves me as His child.

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  26. Adrienne,

    Thank you for being so transparent and showing your heart. It is so easy to be hurt by words from other people, but please know that for every one person that tries to hurt you/your feelings, there are ten more lifting you up and loving you in prayer.

    There is a very old, and simple saying that my father has said to me all my life. . . I think he stole it from a country song :)

    You've got to stand for something or you'll fall for anything.

    Thank you for being a light in this world. Thank you for being a Godly example. Thank you for standing for the Lord and His ways. You are an inspiration.

    Pastor James MacDonald once said, "even the donkey knew that the palm trees and the blankets were for the person on his back and not for him. It isn't for me that I do these things, Lord, it is for you!!"

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  27. If my personal comments caused you to shed tears I am very sorry. It was not my intention.
    Politics seem to bring out alot of intense emotions in we human beings.
    May God bring you peace this day.
    Gentle hugs
    Renee

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  28. Robin, of course I'm not judging you or drawing conclusions about you. You wrote "I wonder why someone who doesn't love God would read..." so I was simply trying to explain some reasons: maybe they want to learn more about people who love God and their perspective, etc.

    You are free to read anything you want to read (and stay away from anything you don't). That's your personal decision and it should be respected.

    Thank you for explaining your point of view. While I may not feel the same exact way that you do, I can certainly understand and respect the concept. I know you said "Unbelievers do not understand this so I do not try to explain it." Maybe if people seemed interested or asked about it, you could try to explain it. As was the case with me, people may not "get it" completely, but hopefully they would gain understanding and respect your views.

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  30. Amber8:31 AM

    I want to say that I do not know you and I choose not to read any negative comments toward you. I check your blog daily and I love the way you write and the "spiritual" feeling I get when reading your blog. I can tell what a great person you are and I cry at least a couple of times a week for the pain you have gone thru. I pray for you and your family and I hope you do not let negative comments get you down.

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