One day, four years ago, I was sitting in the kitchen on the phone with a friend. I heard a chainsaw outside and looked out the side window. Much to my dismay, Jason was outside 'trimming' our amazing peach tree. The tree the year before had yielded hundreds of peaches, but it was too overgrown and did need pruning. Jason was convinced that a peach tree should grow straight upwards. I thought it was supposed to be a low hanging tree. We had many discussions prior to his chainsaw extravaganza. There were two main branches, shaped much like a 'Y', and they were very large and hanging low. I pleaded with him to let me first research peach tree pruning before he went crazy with the power tools, but, alas, I took too long, and the smaller opposing branch was gone. I was one grumpy girl. He assured me that in pruning the tree it would yield more fruit in the future, and though I know that principle, the tree looked like a toddler with scissors! I remember being angry with Jason throughout most of that day. It wasn't even that peaches were my favorite fruit, either! Cherries, are, and we have two of those trees in the front yard. This was during a time in my life when I was very lonely for friendships and eating for company's sake...
That night I had a dream about the peach tree. It was very vivid...I can still see it clearly as I type tonight. In the dream I looked out the window to look at the peach tree. It was dark outside but a full moon lit the sky. I could see the tree shaking though there was no wind. As I looked more closely, I could see a dark figure in the tree. I took another step forward because I was mad that something was in my peach tree. The branches opened and there sat a dark brown, hairy, ferocious looking creature staring back at me. It was a wolverine. I had only seen wolverines in an animated fashion advertising for the University of Michigan. I had never even seen a picture of a real one, but I knew in my dream that a wolverine was in my peach tree and it was acting extremely territorial.
The next day I was reading the Bible and praying. I wasn't studying anything in particular but the word 'glutton' popped into my head. I was NOT studying about gluttony. It was the last thing I wanted to think about as I finished off the bag of 'Riesens'. Now, I've said before that when a thought pops into your head that is smarter than you, it's usually God so you should stop and listen. I got out my dictionary and looked up the word 'glutton'. (I'd quote the definition here as it reads in my dictionary but much to my dismay, I packed it when we were getting the house ready for showing! Regret!) Anyway, I read through the definition, and near the end where it gave examples of gluttonous things, it said, 'like a wolverine, a ferocious, territorial eater'...WHAM BAM.
This is more or less what followed..."Okay, Lord. I get it. I'm a glutton. You are right. I am sorry for filling my life with food instead of You. I am sorry for being a hypocrite. I repent of feeding my face and starving my soul. Satan, you don't have control over my life...the Lord rebuke you! I repent of sins passed on through my family relating to food obsession and gluttony. Lord, I thank you that Your grace is sufficient and that I am free. Give me strength to make the right choices to steward this temple with which you have entrusted me and thank You for opening my eyes."
That's the spiritual side of my journey with food. I had hungered and thirsted after food, drink, and things. I was not satisfied in any sense of the word, literally, because I was worshipping a false god and those things were incapable of satisfying.
"Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they will be filled." Matthew 5:6
Jesus answered, "Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." John 4:14
"Give us today our daily bread." Matthew 6:11
Jesus answered, "I tell you the truth, you are looking for me, not because you saw miraculous signs but because you ate the loaves and had your fill. Do not work for food that spoils, but for food that endures to eternal life, which the Son of Man will give you. On him God the Father has place his seal of approval." John 6:26-27
Jesus answered, "The work of God is this: to believe in the one he has sent." John 6:29
Jesus said to them, "I tell you the truth, it is not Moses who has given you the bread from heaven, but it is my Father who gives you the true bread from heaven. For the bread of God is he who comes down from heaven and gives life to the world." John 6:32-33
Then Jesus declared, "I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty. But as I told you, you have seen me and still you do not believe." John 6:35-36
"No one has seen the Father except the one who is from God; only he has seen the Father. I tell you the truth, he who believes has everlasting life. I am the bread of life. Your forefathers ate the manna in the desert, yet they died. But here is the bread that comes down from heaven, which a man may eat and not die. I am the living bread that came down from heaven. If anyone eats of this bread, he will live forever. This bread is my flesh, which I will give for the life of the world." John 6:46-51
Lord, I pray for myself and everyone reading this, that our worth would be found in You alone, that our satisfaction would come from your living water, the Son, the Bread of Life. When we want to fill our faces out of emotional insecurity, let us draw near to you and be filled. Each of us, as humans, have different struggles, Lord, but anything that distracts us from our pursuit of You is a false god that will never suffice. Lead us by Your Holy Spirit. Give us eternal perspective. Stir up the gifts in each of us for Your glory and Your purpose and help us to enjoy food for what it is...