I can't stop crying...
I'm not sad about missing Noah right now...that's not where my tears are coming from. I'm not sad at all...I'm in AWE!
He's UH MAZE ING! He's more than I EH-VER imagined! I should be jumping up and down, but let's face it, I'm 37 and that's not a sight anyone needs to take in, not even God :) You see, this is random so try to track with me, but I've always loved God and known He loves me. As a Catholic kid, I enjoyed hearing the stories in the Bible at CCD. I mostly paid attention in mass, but I'm not going to lie...when people were returning to their seats after communion, I looked down at their shoes to see if there were any cool ones :) I would watch as the priests raised their hands and wondered why everyone else wasn't, I mean, God was BIG and WORTHY, SOOO?????...I'd sneak mine up by my sides once in a while so it didn't look like I was raising them, since I didn't know if that was 'allowed' by the 'basic' people, if you will...Anyway, I knew that I loved God and wanted to show him with my life, so figured I'd be a nun, (in my mind, that was the only way, right?)...and then, of course, there were cute boys, so I wasn't quite sure how that would fit into the picture, but I knew it would somehow.
Long story short: the more I learned about God, the more I wanted others to know how awesome He is. When I graduated college with a Theology degree, I didn't know what the heck I was going to do! My friends and I held up a sign at graduation that read, "Will preach for food". I didn't know how or when God would open the door for me to share His love with other women, but I trusted it would happen. I nannied for a year after college and loved those kids, the whole family, like my own, but then we had to move. I worked at a college with young women for 5 years and LOVED my job, minus some difficult times, but in all, next to being a wife and mom, being paid to hang out with college girls hungry for more of God and curious about life...well, for me, it just didn't get any better than that! I've been gone from that job for 8+ years now, helped form a women's ministry at our old church and have been enjoying my journey as a wife and mom...and at the same time, always wanting to encourage women more...then Noah 'happened'. There were days during his hospital stay that I thought there was no way his life, his death, our experience could actually encourage ANYONE! For the love, people, my kid died...not the happiest of endings, you know?! (Especially not for the 'name it and claim its' who would equate his death with a lack of faith!) (#$%^&*) ANYWAY, and, there were days during the journey that I thought, regardless of how deliberately satan tried to discourage me, he would not get ANY glory because God is good, He knows what the heck He's doing, and He's going to get the glory...oh, and by the way, I'm not going to shut up but share God all the more, devil.
So here I am, the Friday before Monday, January 12th, 2009, two years after my tender, sweet smelling, handsome boy left this place, bawling my head off, thankful that God, in His wisdom, did not leave me or blow off my dreams, ones He planted in me, but has brought me to a place where I am willing and excited to share His love for other women. On Monday night, we launch "The Well" at our church. I don't know all that God has in store, but I imagine it has to do with His love for women being poured out on hearts that never realized how very much He loves them...I imagine women will fall in love with the Very One who loves them, exactly the way they are, and as a result, they'll want to share with others, and they'll want to share with others, and they'll want to share with others...and God gets all the glory, and His love is poured out, and women all over the world fall in love with the Lover of their soul, and then, well, hopefully Jesus comes back soon because people everywhere are actually excited about His return, not trying to debate Him but receiving His free gift of salvation, and...we all live happily ever after in His presence in Heaven, His presence where we were created to be, and, I get to play with Noah again...I'm thinking this is the beginning of lots of very happy endings!
If you are local or know a woman who is, check it out...
http://www.redrockschurch.com/connect/womens-ministry/
If you feel led to pray for revival in the hearts of women, in your community and all over the world, please email me at adexoxox@gmail.com . There is a group of intercessors that will specifically pray for "The Well", taken from the woman at the well who encounters Christ, the Messiah of the world, from John chapter 4. We would love to have people praying in every state of the USA, every province in Canada, every country on every continent around this beautiful world! God wants to dwell in our hearts richly...let's be praying for our hearts to be softened so He can come in and love on us the way He so desperately intended...
Just wanted to say a quick, belated "Happy Birthday!" and know that many thoughts and prayers are with you during this second 'anniversary' time.
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful way to celebrate such a painful day. I'm so excited for you in this new ministry. I'll be praying that God will do GREAT things through it. . .I've always known that He would do great things through YOU. Erika :)
ReplyDeleteSounds like a great ministry opportunity that will reach many women. I'll be praying that this is fruitful in the lives of MANY women!
ReplyDeleteawww I am so excited for you and what God has been doing the past years. I can't believe it's been 2 years since I started reading. I know that God will use you to bless so many woman's lives and I look forward to hearing about it via blog whenever you do right about it. I'll be praying for The Well. Love the name, the idea, everything. xoxo
ReplyDeleteAwesome awesome awesome! I wish I could be there ...I will think good thoughts during your meetings and maybe be there in spirit.
ReplyDeleteAnd I felt the same way about the priests too *wink* except I was afraid of the nuns so there was no way I was every going to do any of that! (Not the faith part, the being scary and mean to kids during catechism!)
I knew God was big but I never thought of Him as scary unless you made him really really mad!
Cathy
Ade,
ReplyDeleteI have you and Jason in the "for those who grieve" part of my daily prayer journal. I have just now added "The Well" to the "special ministries" section as well. Y'all will get two shots per day.
Milt
I will be praying for you!! Almost 2 years ago God opened the door to start a ministry that reached out to every woman at our church and in our community. We only have the event twice a year, but it has been an incredible blessing, even though in the thick of things I have been known to ask God to "release me" from this calling. I am so glad He has more perseverance than I do!
ReplyDeleteIt is so fun to be front and center when God starts moving in the hearts of women. I feel very blessed to be a small part of that! Good luck and please let us know how it goes!
First off: AHEM, Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday Dear ADE!!!!!Happy Birthday to you!!!
ReplyDeleteAnd- Good luck with your new ministry. Personally you have ministered to me all these years by your Faithfulness and your zest for our God. So thank you!
I'll be praying for The Well. May God's will be done and His glory shown to all who seek Him.
I have goosebumps. He is truly AMAZING and AWESOME and WORTHY. He will meet you at The Well and I can't wait to see what He does there.
ReplyDeletePraying in Arizona!
Marcie
Dear Adrienne,
ReplyDeleteI'll be praying that Monday night is awesome! And I'll be praying for all the women who will be coming. You are such a blessing.
I will also be praying for you on Monday...because I know that it will be a hard day too...missing your sweet boy.
Love,
Melody