Monday, June 16, 2008

I put the "un" in "cool", but it's okay...

Wax Stix glasses
Solar-Rolz TM, as prescribed by my eye doc
The top of the world...at least 9,748 elevation
We carried Noah's balloons 1.34 miles up 948 vertical feet to the top of Devil's Head trail (why do people name mtns after the devil? well, we stood on his head)
Noah's balloons way off in the distance
Em wanted to stack rocks to remember...

So, it was on our hike last Tuesday that I was talking to God about many things. One conversation in particular went like this:
Me: Lord, I would like You to just give me humility. I know You don't really work that way, but You giving it to me would be much nicer than learning it...but either way, Lord, I desire more humility in my life...
Lord: (nothin')

Move onto Friday morning when I went to an ophthalmologist to have my eye checked out. You see, for the prior week, I wore my glasses, which the glasses alone are fine, it's the wearing them part I abhor, to give my right eye a break. My vision in my right eye has gradually become blurry, regardless of corrective lenses. So, he took one look at my eye and told me that it looked like I had rubbed sand paper all over it. He told me that I am not allowed to wear my contacts until further notice. I asked if I could just "quick get Lasik?" but he informed me that he can't do surgery on my cornea in that condition. I told him I just started training for a marathon walk, "How am I supposed to work out?" "Like anyone else that wears glasses and works out", he stated plainly. "But it's sunny, I don't have prescription shades." "Oh, you can grab a few of my complimentary Post-Mydriatic Sunglasses on your way out...they are actually kind of cool."

They may be cool on their own...like still in their packaging or still sitting on his office counter, but then I put them on and BLASTO, they became un-cool!

So this may not be a big deal to anyone else, but for me, who has worn my contacts for 20 years straight, for between 14 and 18 hours a day (hence, the scratches), this is more than just having to wear my glasses. For me, I know God is taking my request for humility seriously. I PRAY and HOPE, for REAL, I learn it on the fast track...

So, would you like to encourage me with a story of when you prayed a prayer that you meant but didn't really want to do the work, so much?


13 comments:

  1. Anonymous7:54 AM

    You've reminded me (again) of why I don't sing the "brokenness" verse on that song that usually starts with "faithfulness, faithfulness is what I long for.... faithfulness is what I need...". I just can't in all honesty sing that I'm longing for brokenness! I don't long for that -- it scares the heck out of me!

    I don't have a "something I prayed for" story off the top of my head, but I did want to say how much I liked that Em wanted to create an Ebenezer! That's just awesome.

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  2. Anonymous8:12 AM

    I love it! God has a great sense of humor. I prayed for more patience,(at the biggest request of my husband), and in turn spent the next several weeks in long lines at grocery stores, busy traffic in an "unbusy" rush hour town, pestier kids than normal, and a mother-in-law that dropped in more often than usual. Since then I haven't "prayed" for more patience, but am more aware of when God is giving me opportunities to exercise it!! I love God's sense of humor once I can look back and see it :)

    Love ya -Angie from MO

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  3. i prayed that God would help to keep me from getting bitter. little did i know the symptoms from wegener's disease that were unnamed and quietly lurking were about to hit me with full force. it was 5 years of chemo and steriod treaments, lots of weight gain, pain, fatigue, mood swings, and MORE! i let the Lord use it to tenderize my broken but angry heart again. :)

    (ps - you can't look uncool - you are the definition of cool. your pic is in the dictionary under "coolest.")

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  4. Adrienne,

    This something that I prayed for turned out exactly how I'd hoped it wouldn't. And until I see God face to face, I can't even be sure if this was God saying "You asked for it", and Him saying "Be careful what you pray for." Let me explain....

    I became pregnant with my 3rd boy at the end of 2004, and boy was I shocked. A friend of mine had found out she was pregnant about a month prior, so we were excited to be sharing our pregnancies together. Her husband is in the Army, and was being deployed to Iraq at the end of January 2005. She had already had a few complications with bleeding, and as you can expect, she was a wreck with her husband leaving for a year. I've know her husband most of my life--he was and still is like a brother to me, so I was hurting for them both that he would be gone.

    The night before he left, with the most sincerity that I could muster, I laid down before God that if something had to happen to her husband or her baby, that I'd rather He take mine. I told God I knew I was close to Him, much closer than she was, and I could "handle" something of that tragedy better than she could. I said, "God, if you have to make a choice, I want you to choice me to have the pain. I want to carry the hurt." I truly meant this pray. I cried over it for some time, but not out of what God REALLY could do with that prayer, but that I had decided to tell God that I wanted to carry the burden for someone else. 7 weeks later at my 5 month check-up on March 18, 2005, God came and got our son.

    I Still to this day believe that God answered the prayer of someone who wanted to carry the burden. My friend had a beautiful baby girl, and her husband came home safe from Iraq after a year.

    The pain was very deep that day we learned that God needed our son far more than we wanted him, but there was such a peace that day that can really only be described as the grace of God carrying us through that time. A peace I can't even decribe unless you've walked through something similar. My friend always comments, to this day, how I handled my son's death so proudly, how she could have never have gone through something like that and to be proud to tell the story of a God who got all the glory from a loss, but I tell her it wasn't anything I did that got me through it, it was everything God did. You can't find peace like that from yourself.

    I'm sure that more deep than you were expecting to hear. I never told her this story when I lost my son, but last year when her husband was deployed again, and after talking to her more about God from that point, I told her my prayer. I told her I didn't know if I could always carry her burden for her, because God likes to deal with us personally, and she may go through her own battles that can't be carried by someone else, but that as long as she trusts in God, she'll be ok. She was saved on October 18th, 2007.

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  5. Last year I found out that I had an ulcer on the cornea of my eye and could not wear my contacts. My eyes were watering so bad I couldn't get the stupid things in let alone leave them on my eyeball. I couldn't even work because the lighting in my office was too bright for my eyes to stand. I couldn't drive because the sun was too bright so I too had to wear those stylish Joe Cool sunglasses in my glasses with my sunglasses over the top. Totally, uncool.

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  6. It's not like God only teaches me the things I ask for, since He's the One that made it specific on my heart. I wouldn't come up with this stuff...

    Anyway, Amanda, thank you for sharing your story. Only in God's presence will you know the rest of the story. I'm sorry for your loss!

    And, Heidi Jo, first, I want you to know I have and continue to, pray for you and God's healing in your body. And, two, I looked in the dictionary and there was not a picture of me next to 'coolest', just fyi, it was actually a picture of Bono:)

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  7. Anonymous2:26 PM

    Ade- this one made me laugh so hard! not at your scratchy eyeball (ouch!) but at the coolness factor... you can rock those shades. You just gotta work it. You know that's why we're friends right, because of the cool thing. love ya so much in your silliness, Rachel

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  8. Anonymous3:51 PM

    I feel your pain with the having to wear glasses thing. I seriously thought about trying out for Survivor and obviously I'd be wanted on ANY team since I believe my glasses could start a fire from the sun reflecting through them in whatever remote island we'd be on. At 30 yrs. when I attempt to fold my glasses, the right side will not fold all the way down b/c my lens are too thick--- and my lens are rolled, which means they are made to be thinner!!! So, again I feel your pain!! But as you have stated so many times before, we have so much to be thankful for, rather than, in my case, wonder why God gave me "walleye vision!"

    Happy Mon.!
    Jill in MN

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  9. Adrienne, sometimes I think He is operating off of a different dictionary or word definition than we are! You taught me that! You wanted a miracle for Noah, but you wanted one kind of miracle and He gave you another. He does that a lot.
    Thanks to you, when I pray I offer thanks to Him (even if I've had a rough day where nothing goes right and I have a lot of pain, I HAD that day!) and ask for strength for myself and a better understanding toward others. I don't waste my prayers on asking for a lottery win or my favorite team to win—frivolous stuff. Prayers matter, so why waste that connection with God by asking for something stupid?
    I think He answers us, but sometimes it's not in the way we originally envision.
    He is listening. And He has helped you find that humility. In turn, you have helped me work on mine!
    I hope your eyes feel better soon!

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  10. i love the way God answers our prayers:0) wait, let me rephrase that.... i love the way God answers other peoples prayers. when He does it to me, i am usually graciously annoyed! :0)

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  11. Anonymous10:25 PM

    I went through the same thing, so I went to the "Glasses Shop" and spent a ridiculous amount of money on trendy glasses. I get compliments on them all the time. Now, I wear my contacts to church on Sunday mornings :-)

    I don't know if that is supportive of you quest for humility.

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  12. Love the balloon picture. We ( my 2kids at the time, my husband, and my self) let some balloons go over the lake where we live the day after my delivery. It helped my daughter with closure. It will be 5years on July 17th. What a beautiful way for you all to remember sweet Noah.

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  13. This is a comment for Amanda who shared the story of her prayer and the loss of her son. Having recently welcomed our first child, a beautiful little girl I can't imagine what you went through. I can imagine (I like to think) praying the prayer you prayed and even meaning it - but to experience the result of it is beyond my ability to comprehend. What a great gift of grace that you had the encouragement and joy of seeing your friend saved. May God bless you and comfort you. Your story has inspired, encouraged and challenged me. Thank you for sharing it.

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