Guest Blogging

My friend Katie Wetherbee interviewed me a while back and is now posting the interview in parts over at her blog.  I wanted to share the link so you could head over to her blog.  It was encouraging to me to answer questions, rather than write or speak about it as I usually do.  Something freeing about the process for me, even five and a half years later.

Katie does a lot of things, but one is to help families of children with special needs make quality connections within the local church.

Did you know many families with disabled children do not attend church because either the building itself is not accessible or because the body of people there are either unwilling or not educated on how to care for their children during a one hour service?

Are churches only for families with 2.5 kids who have no allergies, disabilities, or other special needs?

That's like saying the church is only for blond haired, blue eyed people from a certain region of Europe...and we all know how that worked out!

Jesus came to seek and save the lost.  

Ummmmm.  That would be EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON. ON. EARTH.

Do you have to go to church in order to have a relationship with the Lord?

Ummmmm....NO!  Plenty of churches around the world are welcoming, loving places where anyone would feel part of the fold.  And then, there are plenty of others out there that Jesus wouldn't even set foot in because they are just too darned perfect...I would encourage you not to go to those, anyway.

Sorry, I'm off on a tangent.

If our son Noah had lived, he would have continued to have special needs, just as he did in the hospital with a staff of 40 loving nurses and countless doctors and specialists.

In real life, outside the hospital, it takes a community of support and encouragement to come around families of children with different disabilities.  Heck, it takes a community of support and encouragement to come around EVERYONE.


*If you or someone you know would like to know more about getting your church up-to-date with how to lovingly come alongside families of children with special needs, check out:  www.keyministry.org 

Guest Blogging

Today you will find me at "Diving for Pearls."

Katie Wetherbee is a new friend, who is actually an old friend.  And by "old" I mean, she prayed for us during our journey with Noah through hearing of his blog.  Earlier this Spring we were able to email back and forth and finally share ear to ear.  I wish we lived where I could meet her face to face.

One night I sat and read through the story of Katie and her family.  She has it neatly organized on her blog, so it's easy to do.  (Sorry.  You won't find that here.  I'm still working on my organizational skills.)  It was like a book I could not put down, reading her words, her experiences and emotions, and being able to picture the hospital life she lived with her daughter because of our personal experience.

Katie is a beautiful woman and a wonderful new friend!  I love her heart and the core of the ministry she carries out on a daily basis.  Her blog states, "Helping children with special needs thrive at home, school, and church."  She is the Director of Education for Key Ministry.  This mission of Key Ministry is "to equip churches to welcome and include children and families affected by hidden disabilities in all aspects of the life of the church."  The website has great insight and resources to educate oneself and learn more about how we as a body of believers can build bridges and welcome every person into the walls of an actual church, and into the arms of a loving community.

As a mother, she is facing the out-of-state drive and delivery of her first born to college next fall, with a younger one still working through high school.  I have one in diapers still and another just exiting 4th Grade in two weeks.  We are in two very different phases of life, but I believe we all have much to learn from one another.

I hope you will head over to "Diving for Pearls" where Katie is launching the first of a series called "Messages from Moms," where yours truly is first out of the gates.

My heart in being part of this is to encourage families far and wide as they journey through parenting, no matter how it looks.  Our son Noah passed away, but the time he was on this Earth I would say he had some very special needs.  Had he lived, he would have been "labeled" as such and it would have been, and is, my heart, to know him intimately and love him especially the way he was, understanding his needs to help him flourish.  Just as I try to do with my other two.

Cat fight!!!

Have you ever seen, or been in, a cat fight? Did you know that satan (sorry, I can't get myself to capitalize his name...) loves cat fights? That's right! He loves to stir up jealousy, greed, unforgiveness, strife, comparison, insecurity, and especially discontent among women. As long as he can entice us to focus on what we don't have or why 'she has more of this or that', our eyes are on our circumstances instead of the One who loves us, is faithful to provide for us and has a plan for our lives. The truth is, there will always be someone who has: more money; better clothes; more kids; a better job; a better boyfriend or husband; more friends; a more peaceful family, etc. etc. Instead of wishing we were as talented as so and so, why can't we first see each woman as a uniquely designed instrument designed by God to be part of a magnificent orchestra? Not every musician in an orchestra wants to be a violinist...nor should they be.

Yeah, the devil hates it when women know who they are in Christ. He hates it when we read God's word, but not only that, he hates it when we begin to have the audacity to believe it! You see, even the devil knows God's word. In Matthew chapter 4 we find the temptation of Jesus in the wilderness. Jesus had just fasted for forty days and nights and was hungry. It says, "3The tempter came to him and said, "If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread." 4Jesus answered, "It is written: 'Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.'" In the next verse the devil goes on to actually quote scripture to Jesus. Why wasn't there authority behind the devil quoting scripture? Because the next section of scripture Jesus shows that He worships the Lord God and serves Him only. His heart was not divided. He knew who He was and He knew He had a purpose. We are no different in that we can know who we are in the Lord and we can know His purpose for our lives. However, if our hearts are consumed with who we are not, our minds cluttered with all the what ifs, and our lives filled with things that will only temporarily satisfy, we will never experience the fullness and depth of relationship the Lord intends for each of us.

So, what then? First we can go before the Lord and recognize there is no such thing as a secret when it comes to us actually trying to hide something from Him. We need to be honest with the Lord about our hearts toward ourselves and others. In doing that, it opens a door for us to freedom. Freedom in being able to lay it all at His feet and say, "Let Your kingdom come, let Your will be done." Trusting that He actually knew what He was doing when He designed you. Next, we need to appreciate that it is part of God's design that we are all different. Each of us reflects a different part of God's beauty...we are made by Him, to display His splendor. So, instead of resenting or being jealous of the women we know and meet, let's ask the Lord to show us His heart for each other, how we can pray for one another, encourage them in their gifts, love them the way we are called to love. For some, another step will need to be taken. A step of repenting and asking God, and perhaps another woman or women, for forgiveness...If we are to have God's heart for all women, that will include the ones that we have hated, ones who have betrayed us, ones with different callings or passions or world views.

If we ask God for His eyes and His heart for the women in our lives we will be able to work together, sharing God's love as He intended it. As long as we believe we are actually better than someone else, we will never be used to minister to them. How disheartening to hold onto our grievances to one day learn that the very women we judged were the ones God had called us to love...

Parts is parts

So, it seems like every time I sit down to read God's word lately, I am drawn to passages discussing the Body of Christ, the Church, its many members, not like how many people, but the roles and gifts in which we function, like actual body parts. The topic keeps coming up in different circles and certain scenarios remind me of the scriptures spelled out in regard to a smoothly operating body. You know, one body, many parts, spiritual gifts, living sacrifices.

I have witnessed many circles where people are enjoying the work or ministry in which they are involved. It comes naturally because that particular person was created by God to be an arm or a knee or an ear and they are functioning in it. Then, there are situations where I have encountered crusty, bitter, fried people who are really shoulders or elbows functioning in hand or foot mode. They wonder why everyone else isn't stepping up to the plate doing their part in the Church. They have strong opinions about how everyone should be serving and where and when and whom. Their passionate desire which initially started as a way to show God's love has now resulted in burnout and self-righteousness. And, of course, there are those who sit on their buns and think everything appears to be running smoothly so there is no need to get involved. Usually, this translates into two things; 1: laziness, or 2: a person literally has no clue how uniquely God has created them and they have never tasted the richness of touching someone else's life through their God-given gifts.

I do not pretend to have all the answers. I have been frustrated in the past when people aren't 'getting involved'. I had this idea of what using your gifts looked like and was blown when people weren't 'doing it.' I am guessing that when we are passionate about something that the guy next to us could give a rip about, that means he is passionate about something else, but that we are being led by God to do such and such.

Imagine, if everyone went overseas on missions, no one would be home to hear the gospel. What if every person served in children's church? There would be no one impacting the lives of the elderly or shut ins that suffer loneliness everyday. If every person were an evangelist, there would be a lot of people hearing about the life changing name of Christ, but they would all be babies in their faith because depth and discipleship have to follow evangelism.

The reality is that when we are all functioning in the part for which we were created, burnout levels should be low, self-righteousness should be nipped in the bud, and there would even be joy in serving. Not knowing what you are gifted in is not an excuse, either. It's quite simple...ask God to show you how He created you so that you can be used for His purposes in the earth. People choose vocations everyday based on what they are good at or what they enjoy. Ask God to reveal to you what you are good at and start doing that particular thing. You may be good at making soup. Make some at a shelter. You may love talking to people. Strike up a conversation with a stranger and let God's love do the rest. I admittedly get frustrated with the mentality that there has to be an organized, structured 'outreach' in order to share God's love. Wherever you go, even to the grocery store, we are lights for the Lord. The more we start functioning in the gifts God has given us, the more naturally we'll live in this skin. Not more comfortably. Naturally, the way God intended.

If you aren't a finger, you should not be pointing.