My camera died the second day of the Avon Walk, but don't worry! Jason ordered a new one that is being sent to South Dakota to his mom's house. It will be there just in time for me to take pictures of God's beautiful art in the skies. If you are new here, South Dakota sunsets are phenomenal!
I'll also post some pictures of Em in her Sacajawea outfit I made her. It is totally cute...though I'm still trying to decide if I should buy black hairspray for her or not. She wants me to dye her hair with one of those 28 day wash in colors...sorry, kid! Not going to happen!
Our friend is going with us so he and Jason can hunt. So...I get to be chauffeured to SD. While I'm riding along, I will be working on gathering some writing samples to give to a literary agent...I am so excited! Please pray for me, if you think of it, because I feel like I've gotten my mojo back! Em will be enjoying her many crafts and car trip activities sent to her by Nana for the next 12 hours.
Quick note: Em and I were reading in Genesis when God created Adam and Eve yesterday, but in my Bible (hers is the children's shortened version...) Anyway, it said that God created trees that were pleasing to the eye and good for food. I asked her to look around and see if she could see any trees pleasing to the eye...She looked at me with one of those "OBVIOUSLY" looks and said an emphatic, "YES!" I hope you take the time to look around this season and enjoy the color scheme God chose for His fall line...
Friday, October 24, 2008
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
God's a gentleman...
...it's only when we are stubborn that He allows us to feel the consequences of our choices...
For anyone who thinks that God is a big meanie, exposing things in our lives that we'd rather have hidden, this has been on my heart and I really want to talk about it...we've all seen it on TV. Preachers, evangelists, public leaders, pastors, politicians, even private citizens...our private lives exposed in a public fashion, at least the choices we think we make in private. None of the choices we make in secret are truly just that...there is no such thing as a secret.
And when we try to keep things hidden in our lives, things that we think would actually shock others because it would reveal our imperfections, our temptations, our deepest, darkest longings, we actually believe that we've 'got it under control.' We've got it together. I am not trying to call anyone out on their sin. We all know that isn't fun! But that's what I'm talking about here...God first gently tugs at our hearts. It's like a gentle tap...you know someone touched your shoulder or called your name, but you turn around and you're alone. He lovingly will tell us privately, through conviction from the Holy Spirit, that something in our life does not line up with His divine plan for us. Sometimes, when we are listening and not too busy trying to perform, we obey His gentle nudge and experience grace and freedom. Too often at this level though, we take the grace for granted. Or, if we don't, we continue to press forward.
If we ignore His gentle nudge, the next one is probably through a friend, family member, or someone else we love and trust that would never want to damage our heart. God allows them to sense something in our life, not even necessarily telling them specifics, just leading them in a certain direction for prayer, and in their obedience, they talk to us, or just ask us how we are doing. Do we answer? Do we just say, "Fine." What do we do with that? Again, it's God nudging our hearts, convicting us of choices that don't benefit us or bring glory to Him, and, because we don't make choices in a vacuum, He's allowed others to pray for us so our eyes are opened. Do we pretend that everything is fine or do we take responsibility for our choices? Do we confide in our friends or do we try to work out our problems on our own, even when God opened the door for them to walk right into it...to walk with us? If we humble ourselves, we repent, admit our weaknesses and imperfections to those people who know we aren't perfect for all obvious reasons, our hearts are restored to God and healing begins to take place. Again, grace. But will our pride for posing as a perfectionist pose a problem?!
We all know how God has gently nudged us. We, the viewers, are the only ones shocked or surprised when TV announces publicly someones secret choices made in private. I guarantee that the party spoken of wasn't shocked in the least. It wasn't the first time God revealed that person's sin to them, but because the person desired it to be private, and God hates sin in our lives and wants it as far away from us as possible, He'll do what it takes to expose it so we can move on and begin living a life of grace, as He designed.
Only the Enemy of our hearts will tell us to hold onto our sins. Only the Devil will tell us that "it's not that big of a deal...everybody has struggles...no one needs to know about this one incidence...you haven't acted on it, you've only just entertained the thoughts...this is our little secret...hold onto that anger, they deserve your wrath...my choices don't affect others...it was only once, twice, 100 times..." Only Satan thinks it's a good idea to try to keep secrets from God. God, however, knows there is no such thing as a secret. He doesn't convict our hearts to be a big meanie or rule maker. He convicts our hearts because He hates sin and knows its effects on our lives, on our souls, in our minds, our spirits. He tells us, gently at first, because He's not shocked by anything we do, nor is He looking to run the other way...that's us...we do that...He's STEADY.
None of us have to experience public exposure of our sins if we are quick to listen to God's many warnings and gentle nudges. God really loves us that much...Do we really think anyone expects us to be perfect? He knows we aren't, that's what the cross was for...
Before my girlfriends and I became friends, I put this out there: "I'm not looking for friendship that is fluffy and shallow. I want you to tell me hard core truth, even if it hurts. That's the only kind of friendship I'm looking for, so if that's what you want, too, great...if not..." I'll admit it weeds it out for itself, but the women in my life that I love and love me in return know better than to blow sunshine at me. Even if it sucks to tell me that I SUCK, I want them to do that so that I can grow, change, seek forgiveness, seek God's will more hotly. Yes, I disappoint. I make poor choices. I hurt feelings. But the more quickly I get on my knees before God and humble myself to the person I have hurt, the more quickly I experience God's grace.
God said He will expose those things that are hidden, He will bring things hidden into the light. His heart behind it is so we can be close to Him...close to the very One Who created us, close to the God of the Universe that loves you more than life itself, therefore allowing His Son to die specifically for you...
Tell God about it...since He already knows...
For anyone who thinks that God is a big meanie, exposing things in our lives that we'd rather have hidden, this has been on my heart and I really want to talk about it...we've all seen it on TV. Preachers, evangelists, public leaders, pastors, politicians, even private citizens...our private lives exposed in a public fashion, at least the choices we think we make in private. None of the choices we make in secret are truly just that...there is no such thing as a secret.
And when we try to keep things hidden in our lives, things that we think would actually shock others because it would reveal our imperfections, our temptations, our deepest, darkest longings, we actually believe that we've 'got it under control.' We've got it together. I am not trying to call anyone out on their sin. We all know that isn't fun! But that's what I'm talking about here...God first gently tugs at our hearts. It's like a gentle tap...you know someone touched your shoulder or called your name, but you turn around and you're alone. He lovingly will tell us privately, through conviction from the Holy Spirit, that something in our life does not line up with His divine plan for us. Sometimes, when we are listening and not too busy trying to perform, we obey His gentle nudge and experience grace and freedom. Too often at this level though, we take the grace for granted. Or, if we don't, we continue to press forward.
If we ignore His gentle nudge, the next one is probably through a friend, family member, or someone else we love and trust that would never want to damage our heart. God allows them to sense something in our life, not even necessarily telling them specifics, just leading them in a certain direction for prayer, and in their obedience, they talk to us, or just ask us how we are doing. Do we answer? Do we just say, "Fine." What do we do with that? Again, it's God nudging our hearts, convicting us of choices that don't benefit us or bring glory to Him, and, because we don't make choices in a vacuum, He's allowed others to pray for us so our eyes are opened. Do we pretend that everything is fine or do we take responsibility for our choices? Do we confide in our friends or do we try to work out our problems on our own, even when God opened the door for them to walk right into it...to walk with us? If we humble ourselves, we repent, admit our weaknesses and imperfections to those people who know we aren't perfect for all obvious reasons, our hearts are restored to God and healing begins to take place. Again, grace. But will our pride for posing as a perfectionist pose a problem?!
We all know how God has gently nudged us. We, the viewers, are the only ones shocked or surprised when TV announces publicly someones secret choices made in private. I guarantee that the party spoken of wasn't shocked in the least. It wasn't the first time God revealed that person's sin to them, but because the person desired it to be private, and God hates sin in our lives and wants it as far away from us as possible, He'll do what it takes to expose it so we can move on and begin living a life of grace, as He designed.
Only the Enemy of our hearts will tell us to hold onto our sins. Only the Devil will tell us that "it's not that big of a deal...everybody has struggles...no one needs to know about this one incidence...you haven't acted on it, you've only just entertained the thoughts...this is our little secret...hold onto that anger, they deserve your wrath...my choices don't affect others...it was only once, twice, 100 times..." Only Satan thinks it's a good idea to try to keep secrets from God. God, however, knows there is no such thing as a secret. He doesn't convict our hearts to be a big meanie or rule maker. He convicts our hearts because He hates sin and knows its effects on our lives, on our souls, in our minds, our spirits. He tells us, gently at first, because He's not shocked by anything we do, nor is He looking to run the other way...that's us...we do that...He's STEADY.
None of us have to experience public exposure of our sins if we are quick to listen to God's many warnings and gentle nudges. God really loves us that much...Do we really think anyone expects us to be perfect? He knows we aren't, that's what the cross was for...
Before my girlfriends and I became friends, I put this out there: "I'm not looking for friendship that is fluffy and shallow. I want you to tell me hard core truth, even if it hurts. That's the only kind of friendship I'm looking for, so if that's what you want, too, great...if not..." I'll admit it weeds it out for itself, but the women in my life that I love and love me in return know better than to blow sunshine at me. Even if it sucks to tell me that I SUCK, I want them to do that so that I can grow, change, seek forgiveness, seek God's will more hotly. Yes, I disappoint. I make poor choices. I hurt feelings. But the more quickly I get on my knees before God and humble myself to the person I have hurt, the more quickly I experience God's grace.
God said He will expose those things that are hidden, He will bring things hidden into the light. His heart behind it is so we can be close to Him...close to the very One Who created us, close to the God of the Universe that loves you more than life itself, therefore allowing His Son to die specifically for you...
Tell God about it...since He already knows...
Friday, October 17, 2008
Lyme update...(thorough)
Because of the amounts of emails regarding this, here's the protocol I am on (I AM NOT TELLING YOU THIS SO YOU'LL RUN OUT AND DO IT. I'M TELLING YOU FOR SAKE OF MY OWN DOCUMENTATION AND RESEARCH. PLEASE, IF YOU HAVE LYME'S OR SUSPECT A CO-INFECTION, CONTACT A LICENSED PRACTITIONER!): borrelia series therapy by Deseret Biologicals that includes Borrelia, Babesia Microti, and Ehrlichia. It is for Professional Use Only and can only be given to you by your naturopathic doctor. It consists of 10 vials that I must take every 3 days, equalling one month, and then possibly more after that. I began the regimen on Monday morning, took vial number 2 on Thursday. The instructions say that between vials 2 and 4 an increase in symptoms may occur. Thus far, or leading up to this point considering it normal, here is what I have experience: continued constant ringing in my ears (years and years, with instances of sudden deafness which returns almost immediately), swollen glands in my throat (off and on since college with a one year strep infection my freshman year), achy arthritic wrists at times, bowel issues (but who knows what's 'normal' anymore?), some slight unexplained dizziness, which are minimal, just need to hold onto something and all returns to normal and some lower back pain, which I haven't had in years. I had it for about 15 years and couldn't sit, stand, lay down for too long. I really hope this isn't aggravated, though acupuncture is the only thing that helped it in the past.
The 'diet' has also been difficult to follow, though I know I haven't really tried...it will be interesting to see how that helps, as I know it does, but that everything bagel just appeared irresistible!!! A side note, I also take an Omega 3.6.9 combo, borage oil, a 20 billion microorganism 12 strain multidophilous, I drink apple cider vinegar for pH, drink chlorophyll to get extra greens, take a prenatal multivitamin (no...) , I try to drink nasty psyllium (hurl) daily (cleans out toxic build up in body) and drink cran water throughout the day for flushing my liver. I try to eat foods as close to the way God made them as possible (whole, minimally refined), I buy non-anti-biotic meats and eggs, and organic fruits and veggies. I also eat chocolate...I mean, if Jesus comes back tomorrow, my Lyme's will be gone since it won't make it to Heaven, but I'll have tasted one of His most amazing inventions on earth, at least...Also, for those following similar regimens, although you may crave alcohol or just have it once in a while with a meal, spirochetes thrive off of it...so, as hard as it may be for some, it's something we must cut out.
I am really excited to share this journey here because of the number of emails I've received from other sufferers, or others who still have no answers from their doctors. I pray that this journey will encourage you to take that first step, even if the docs tell you your tests are 'negative', keep moving forward. I have learned a tremendous amount about Bb and its co-infections in the last two years and it only scrapes the surface. It is all quite intriguing AND, it does not only happen in Lyme, CT, or on the East Coast. It means we can't be ignorant. My friend's little boy was bit by a tick this summer an hour and a half from here, in CO. He tested positive right away. He followed the same protocol I am on, and is great...keeping in mind that was an acute infection...mine is 'chronic'.
Regarding women who have emailed curious about borrelia Burgdorferi infection during pregnancy, my doc is still waiting on the other doc in CA to answer her question regarding treatment while pregnant. Traditional Western docs have treated pregnant women for the disease. While I was riding the subway in NYC, I shared Noah's story, the reason we were walking, and my hope in Christ with a stranger named Amir. He was very sincere. He asked a simple question, "Is it possible Noah was simply born with the antigen, that's why it was present?" I replied, "I don't know. It could have been in utero, or passed through my breast milk. It's unknown."
As time has passed since meeting Amir on the subway, I've thought about that question a lot. I've thought about that possibility, but I am so curious if many babies are born with the antigen, the parents not knowing they carry the antigen, and it's passed off as 'failure to thrive', SIDS, or some other unknown or genetic weakness. (Just thinking out loud here...) Also, for all the unknowns in medicine: Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (which simply states the obvious: you are tired all the time OR SIDS...that gets me even more worked up: Sorry, your Infant Died Suddenly while it was sleeping...THAT'S NOT A DIAGNOSIS, IT'S AN ACRONYM FOR Shoot, I Don't know Squat!) It has also been linked in some research to autism and vaccination complications. I
t's a big can of worms...one that as I've dug in deeper, I am that much more intrigued with it's branching effects, if you will, that much more disgusted at modern medicine for 'ignoring' it, and that much more inspired to continue to look for answers and take action for the future.
But, I want to make one thing clear: Even if we did find a cure for these horrible spirochetes, or any other disease, and save many lives, that would be truly great. Truly! For a time...but we all will die one day and it is that day that is more important to me to share about...what will happen to the healthy person or Lyme, Cancer, Alzheimer, ALS, HIV, Malaria, Dengue fever, AIDS, Diabetes, CF, Chromosome abnormality, genetic disorder, etc. survivor when we die? Jesus wasn't offensive, or exclusive. He is the Savior of the world. He's the hope after death...because THERE IS A HECK OF A LOT MORE LIVING TO DO ONCE WE LEAVE THIS EARTH, BABY! I will work diligently to help find a cure, but even more diligently to encourage others with the hope of Heaven.
The 'diet' has also been difficult to follow, though I know I haven't really tried...it will be interesting to see how that helps, as I know it does, but that everything bagel just appeared irresistible!!! A side note, I also take an Omega 3.6.9 combo, borage oil, a 20 billion microorganism 12 strain multidophilous, I drink apple cider vinegar for pH, drink chlorophyll to get extra greens, take a prenatal multivitamin (no...) , I try to drink nasty psyllium (hurl) daily (cleans out toxic build up in body) and drink cran water throughout the day for flushing my liver. I try to eat foods as close to the way God made them as possible (whole, minimally refined), I buy non-anti-biotic meats and eggs, and organic fruits and veggies. I also eat chocolate...I mean, if Jesus comes back tomorrow, my Lyme's will be gone since it won't make it to Heaven, but I'll have tasted one of His most amazing inventions on earth, at least...Also, for those following similar regimens, although you may crave alcohol or just have it once in a while with a meal, spirochetes thrive off of it...so, as hard as it may be for some, it's something we must cut out.
I am really excited to share this journey here because of the number of emails I've received from other sufferers, or others who still have no answers from their doctors. I pray that this journey will encourage you to take that first step, even if the docs tell you your tests are 'negative', keep moving forward. I have learned a tremendous amount about Bb and its co-infections in the last two years and it only scrapes the surface. It is all quite intriguing AND, it does not only happen in Lyme, CT, or on the East Coast. It means we can't be ignorant. My friend's little boy was bit by a tick this summer an hour and a half from here, in CO. He tested positive right away. He followed the same protocol I am on, and is great...keeping in mind that was an acute infection...mine is 'chronic'.
Regarding women who have emailed curious about borrelia Burgdorferi infection during pregnancy, my doc is still waiting on the other doc in CA to answer her question regarding treatment while pregnant. Traditional Western docs have treated pregnant women for the disease. While I was riding the subway in NYC, I shared Noah's story, the reason we were walking, and my hope in Christ with a stranger named Amir. He was very sincere. He asked a simple question, "Is it possible Noah was simply born with the antigen, that's why it was present?" I replied, "I don't know. It could have been in utero, or passed through my breast milk. It's unknown."
As time has passed since meeting Amir on the subway, I've thought about that question a lot. I've thought about that possibility, but I am so curious if many babies are born with the antigen, the parents not knowing they carry the antigen, and it's passed off as 'failure to thrive', SIDS, or some other unknown or genetic weakness. (Just thinking out loud here...) Also, for all the unknowns in medicine: Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (which simply states the obvious: you are tired all the time OR SIDS...that gets me even more worked up: Sorry, your Infant Died Suddenly while it was sleeping...THAT'S NOT A DIAGNOSIS, IT'S AN ACRONYM FOR Shoot, I Don't know Squat!) It has also been linked in some research to autism and vaccination complications. I
t's a big can of worms...one that as I've dug in deeper, I am that much more intrigued with it's branching effects, if you will, that much more disgusted at modern medicine for 'ignoring' it, and that much more inspired to continue to look for answers and take action for the future.
But, I want to make one thing clear: Even if we did find a cure for these horrible spirochetes, or any other disease, and save many lives, that would be truly great. Truly! For a time...but we all will die one day and it is that day that is more important to me to share about...what will happen to the healthy person or Lyme, Cancer, Alzheimer, ALS, HIV, Malaria, Dengue fever, AIDS, Diabetes, CF, Chromosome abnormality, genetic disorder, etc. survivor when we die? Jesus wasn't offensive, or exclusive. He is the Savior of the world. He's the hope after death...because THERE IS A HECK OF A LOT MORE LIVING TO DO ONCE WE LEAVE THIS EARTH, BABY! I will work diligently to help find a cure, but even more diligently to encourage others with the hope of Heaven.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Part 2...
Well, Em wanted to hop in bed early so she could read me books, I could read her books, and she could draw some pictures. I asked her to pick out which books she wanted and she chose "The Bones Book" by Stephen Cumbaa, and, most importantly in this case, illustrated by Kim La Fave. It's a small booklet about our bodies structure including "An illustrated head-to-toe guide to the human skeleton, vital organs, and body systems." Perfect! And, there on pages 54 and 55 lie the very vital organs necessary to discuss with my sweet girl "Where do babies come from?"
Em: What do you want me to draw for you?
Me: How about Jesus coming on the clouds on a beautiful white horse to rescue us? (NOW, LORD :) )
Em: Okay, can it have a rainbow?
Me: Of course! He'll probably have those in the sky that day, maybe?
Me: Em, how do you think boys and girls are different?
Em, look of "OBVIOUSLY" on her face: Uh, girls are prettier.
Me: How else are we different? (Why argue, right? Hee hee)
Em points below the waist...
Segue onto page 54, the Female Pelvis. I assess knowledge base...
Me: Em, you know women have 3 exits, right? One for peeing, our V (yes, I used the word) and one for poop...
Em: Mom, you could have said, "Number 2".
Me, thinking: (You are killing me kid. This isn't the easiest thing. Work with me, here! Sheesh!)
I talk to her about ovaries, eggs, relate egg/chicken/chick story here, proceed with fallopian tubes, puberty, release of eggs due to lack of fertilization, exit of eggs through the ya ya...no, I didn't say that. Just an edited version on blog because I don't want weirdos here...ANYWAY...
Em: I have eggs?
Me: Yep. God designed women to have eggs, just like chickens, but not crunchy. (Dear God, help me out here...)
Em: Yeah, we don't have shells! What are my eggs doing?
Me: Right now, they are just hanging out...(Em interrupts with a smile on her face: They're just talkin'.) until the time when you become a young woman.
Em: When I'm 16. (Matter of fact)
*(Did I mention she's still just drawing the Lord's return this whole time? COME LORD JESUS!)
Me: No, not necessarily. Even though we are all females, God has made all of our bodies slightly different in that we don't all become young ladies at the same time and we don't all have the same amount of eggs. (Fertility talk at later date...)
Em: So maybe when I'm 13?
Me: Yeah...we just don't know. We'll just kind of wait and see. Not really something we need to worry about, you know? (Dear God, ditto last sentiment...)
Thank you, page 54, for having an inset of an egg and sperm. Segue onto page 55, The Male Pelvis, for further education...
Me: So, Em, these (insert biological definitions here...) are the specific parts God designed for males. Ours are mainly on the inside and theirs are on the outside. So, instead of ovaries that make eggs, males have T's that make Sperm, (again, not really knowing who might show up on google search at this point...bear with me).
Me: Sperm from a male is what fertilizes an egg from a female.
Em: Just like with the chicken and the rooster!
Me: Yep. (Except I didn't sit on you to keep you warm for 9 months...)
Me: So, see here (on page 55)...these are sperm...
Em: Are they fish?
Me: No, but they swim...(God, seriously?...fish don't have to explain this to their kids...but I guess You know that. Nice sense of humor, Lord!)
Me: Men have millions of them but it only takes one to fertilize an egg to make a baby.
Em, wearing hot pink leopard print pajamas, look on face trying to calculate/visualize 'millions'...
Me: That's more than all the spots on your jammies!
Em: Wow! That's a lot!
Me: So, then, the fertilized egg, which is now a baby (insert life begins at conception speech here) then attaches itself to the wall of the uterus and it grows and then when it's ready, it comes out through the V.
Em: Cool. Will you draw me a picture of something?
Me: Like what?
Em: Like a princess, a castle or a rainbow or something.
Me: Gladly...
So, there you have it...the first of many more talks to come, as she wasn't even curious about the actual mechanics of HOW the egg and sperm hook up! THANK YOU, LORD GOD ALMIGHTY! I know that will come, but she didn't ask, I took that as a cue from her that she had retained all she could at that moment, was satisfied with the information, and will be eager to know more when the time is appropriate. So...GET TALKING! Don't leave me out here in sex ed world all by myself:)
Em: What do you want me to draw for you?
Me: How about Jesus coming on the clouds on a beautiful white horse to rescue us? (NOW, LORD :) )
Em: Okay, can it have a rainbow?
Me: Of course! He'll probably have those in the sky that day, maybe?
Me: Em, how do you think boys and girls are different?
Em, look of "OBVIOUSLY" on her face: Uh, girls are prettier.
Me: How else are we different? (Why argue, right? Hee hee)
Em points below the waist...
Segue onto page 54, the Female Pelvis. I assess knowledge base...
Me: Em, you know women have 3 exits, right? One for peeing, our V (yes, I used the word) and one for poop...
Em: Mom, you could have said, "Number 2".
Me, thinking: (You are killing me kid. This isn't the easiest thing. Work with me, here! Sheesh!)
I talk to her about ovaries, eggs, relate egg/chicken/chick story here, proceed with fallopian tubes, puberty, release of eggs due to lack of fertilization, exit of eggs through the ya ya...no, I didn't say that. Just an edited version on blog because I don't want weirdos here...ANYWAY...
Em: I have eggs?
Me: Yep. God designed women to have eggs, just like chickens, but not crunchy. (Dear God, help me out here...)
Em: Yeah, we don't have shells! What are my eggs doing?
Me: Right now, they are just hanging out...(Em interrupts with a smile on her face: They're just talkin'.) until the time when you become a young woman.
Em: When I'm 16. (Matter of fact)
*(Did I mention she's still just drawing the Lord's return this whole time? COME LORD JESUS!)
Me: No, not necessarily. Even though we are all females, God has made all of our bodies slightly different in that we don't all become young ladies at the same time and we don't all have the same amount of eggs. (Fertility talk at later date...)
Em: So maybe when I'm 13?
Me: Yeah...we just don't know. We'll just kind of wait and see. Not really something we need to worry about, you know? (Dear God, ditto last sentiment...)
Thank you, page 54, for having an inset of an egg and sperm. Segue onto page 55, The Male Pelvis, for further education...
Me: So, Em, these (insert biological definitions here...) are the specific parts God designed for males. Ours are mainly on the inside and theirs are on the outside. So, instead of ovaries that make eggs, males have T's that make Sperm, (again, not really knowing who might show up on google search at this point...bear with me).
Me: Sperm from a male is what fertilizes an egg from a female.
Em: Just like with the chicken and the rooster!
Me: Yep. (Except I didn't sit on you to keep you warm for 9 months...)
Me: So, see here (on page 55)...these are sperm...
Em: Are they fish?
Me: No, but they swim...(God, seriously?...fish don't have to explain this to their kids...but I guess You know that. Nice sense of humor, Lord!)
Me: Men have millions of them but it only takes one to fertilize an egg to make a baby.
Em, wearing hot pink leopard print pajamas, look on face trying to calculate/visualize 'millions'...
Me: That's more than all the spots on your jammies!
Em: Wow! That's a lot!
Me: So, then, the fertilized egg, which is now a baby (insert life begins at conception speech here) then attaches itself to the wall of the uterus and it grows and then when it's ready, it comes out through the V.
Em: Cool. Will you draw me a picture of something?
Me: Like what?
Em: Like a princess, a castle or a rainbow or something.
Me: Gladly...
So, there you have it...the first of many more talks to come, as she wasn't even curious about the actual mechanics of HOW the egg and sperm hook up! THANK YOU, LORD GOD ALMIGHTY! I know that will come, but she didn't ask, I took that as a cue from her that she had retained all she could at that moment, was satisfied with the information, and will be eager to know more when the time is appropriate. So...GET TALKING! Don't leave me out here in sex ed world all by myself:)
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
SEX!
Quick, I have to write this before I forget...
Me: Is Clare pregnant?
Em: Claire, my babysitter?
Jason (simultaneously with Em): Clare N?
Me: Yes.
Jason: Yeah, about 6 months, maybe.
Me: Thanks for letting me know...
Em: Claire my babysitter? She's 16. How can she have a baby?
*Smoke fills the room, lights dim, Beethoven's Symphony #1 in C, Allegro con Brio begins to play dramatically, mom and dad's heart rates elevate ever so slightly...
Jason: No, not Claire your babysitter, Em, though that does happen sometimes.
Me, while scrambling egg, milk and cinnamon for Em's french toast: Em, God's design is that babies are born to a mommy and daddy, but it doesn't always happen that way.
Em: Well, then where do babies come from?
Jason and I both have backs turned to Em, out of corner of our eyes, see smirks on one anothers' faces...
Me to Jason regarding french toast: Want to take over here?
Me: Em, that is actually a very important question that daddy and I have wanted to talk to you about for a while. Mommy and daddy want you to learn this from us because that's how God designed it. It's important that you learn this from us and not other people first.
Jason: But, we don't have time right now to talk about this so we'll talk about it when you are done with soccer tonight...
Em, looking at clock, still waiting for french toast: It's only 8:00, we have plenty of time...
Me: Em, this is such an important conversation that daddy and I want to make sure we have plenty of time to share with you...and if you have questions.
French toast miraculously appears on a plate in front of my sweet peanut!
Me: Eat, Em, we don't want to be late for school...
SOOOOO, we've been praying for the right opportunity to share with Em on the topic of 'where babies come from' and waiting on God for His timing. I actually went to a 'sex talk' on how to share this important topic with our children, delivered by Mary Flo Ridley, about a month ago. I honestly went into the session thinking I was being proactive by a few years and wouldn't need that information until Em was about 25, the day before her wedding! Just kidding! But more like 8 or 10ish. Well, I came home from the sex talk and told Jason that I wanted to tell Em about it right away...NOW HEAR ME OUT...some may be freaking out at the prospect of telling a 6 year old how babies are made, but Mrs. Ridley shares that you don't start with the sensual part of the education, nor the fears and dangers, not right away. You start with the biological facts. Actually, she encourages us as parents to start with a mission statement, if you will, regarding the underlying foundation of truth regarding sex upon which you want to build the remaining components of your families sexual education. So, if you watched the video above, you got a couple of examples. Her family 'motto' is: Sex is a gift from God designed for marriage. Jason and I both appreciate that working definition, knowing full well, obviously from the conversation above, that we'll be explaining other scenarios...though, that layer of the big picture might not occur until a later time.
Anyway, I am so grateful to my friend Kim who let Em collect eggs from her hens last summer. Em knows that the reason the eggs aren't chicks is because they weren't fertilized by the rooster. This is something, biologically, she understands, yet without realizing there is the missing link of HOW the rooster actually carries out fertilization...so, we are going to go from there, relating that mommy has eggs and daddy has the 'fertilizer' component, using the official biological terms.
I'll give an update in case any other parent is nervous about this conversation. Jason and I are very much on the same page about educating Emily about the facts first instead of Em learning really stupid things from her peers on the playground. Also, we want Emily to be taught the truth, God's truth, and WE ARE RESPONSIBLE AS HER PARENTS TO DO THAT, not relying on the school system to do so. Ridley likened kids to sponges...they soak up all sorts of things that they see and hear and once they are full, when we finally try to teach them something important (like waiting until their junior high friends have already told them dumb stuff and experimentation may have already occurred), they get squeemish at the thought of talking about sex to their parents...EEEEWWWWW, HOW EMBARRASSING...the very people who should have empowered them with God's truth in the first place.
Ridley recommends peeling off layers of the conversation by beginning with the facts, plain and simple, always bringing it back to your family mission statement, and then, 1 to 2 years prior to puberty, the same sex respective parent takes the kid on a special little retreat or all day outing where you actually do talk about the more in depth topics, like fears and dangers, the world's social expectations, including STD's, pregnancy, oral sex, dating, infertility because of STD's, all sorts of things...to prepare them for their future. She recommends drawing out a time line of life, like 90 years or so, and having your child dream and brainstorm about life goals and what things they desire to do when they grow up, putting those on the time line. Then, on a time line of 90 years, show them how short the time of adolescence is and then, share with them that those can all be things they pursue and succeed in, encouraging them that they are responsible for their decisions, and that some may or may not be able to come to fruition depending on choices made day to day, namely sexual choices.
Basically, if you are ever given the opportunity to listen to one of her teaching CD's or can hear her in person, I highly recommend taking the time to listen to Mary Flo Ridley's presentation.
As a mom, I have always desired to have this and every other area of life be an open door for my children to be able to talk to me. It is important that I not fearfully avoid the most important topics in life like God, faith, death, sex, hope, etc. because if I avoid them if I am uncomfortable with a specific question or topic, my children, who are designed by God to be curious and hungry to learn, will find that information elsewhere! They will! Sex isn't dirty. God made it. Yeah, God. He made sex and called it good. So, if you give pat answers to your children that 'We don't talk about that' or 'that's naughty', they will get the idea that it is wrong and bad. And, years down the road, what God intended to be beautiful inside marriage will be perverted along the way.
The world mocks Christians for abstinence education. I'm sad for the world for not realizing God made sex, called it good, designed it for marriage so life wouldn't have to be too complicated, yet provides Himself as our Comforter when it has broken our heart or shattered our dreams, knowing we are people of our own wills...because He restores. Teach your kids about the sex God designed...it will provide for the future great husbands and wives one day...
To be continued...
Me: Is Clare pregnant?
Em: Claire, my babysitter?
Jason (simultaneously with Em): Clare N?
Me: Yes.
Jason: Yeah, about 6 months, maybe.
Me: Thanks for letting me know...
Em: Claire my babysitter? She's 16. How can she have a baby?
*Smoke fills the room, lights dim, Beethoven's Symphony #1 in C, Allegro con Brio begins to play dramatically, mom and dad's heart rates elevate ever so slightly...
Jason: No, not Claire your babysitter, Em, though that does happen sometimes.
Me, while scrambling egg, milk and cinnamon for Em's french toast: Em, God's design is that babies are born to a mommy and daddy, but it doesn't always happen that way.
Em: Well, then where do babies come from?
Jason and I both have backs turned to Em, out of corner of our eyes, see smirks on one anothers' faces...
Me to Jason regarding french toast: Want to take over here?
Me: Em, that is actually a very important question that daddy and I have wanted to talk to you about for a while. Mommy and daddy want you to learn this from us because that's how God designed it. It's important that you learn this from us and not other people first.
Jason: But, we don't have time right now to talk about this so we'll talk about it when you are done with soccer tonight...
Em, looking at clock, still waiting for french toast: It's only 8:00, we have plenty of time...
Me: Em, this is such an important conversation that daddy and I want to make sure we have plenty of time to share with you...and if you have questions.
French toast miraculously appears on a plate in front of my sweet peanut!
Me: Eat, Em, we don't want to be late for school...
SOOOOO, we've been praying for the right opportunity to share with Em on the topic of 'where babies come from' and waiting on God for His timing. I actually went to a 'sex talk' on how to share this important topic with our children, delivered by Mary Flo Ridley, about a month ago. I honestly went into the session thinking I was being proactive by a few years and wouldn't need that information until Em was about 25, the day before her wedding! Just kidding! But more like 8 or 10ish. Well, I came home from the sex talk and told Jason that I wanted to tell Em about it right away...NOW HEAR ME OUT...some may be freaking out at the prospect of telling a 6 year old how babies are made, but Mrs. Ridley shares that you don't start with the sensual part of the education, nor the fears and dangers, not right away. You start with the biological facts. Actually, she encourages us as parents to start with a mission statement, if you will, regarding the underlying foundation of truth regarding sex upon which you want to build the remaining components of your families sexual education. So, if you watched the video above, you got a couple of examples. Her family 'motto' is: Sex is a gift from God designed for marriage. Jason and I both appreciate that working definition, knowing full well, obviously from the conversation above, that we'll be explaining other scenarios...though, that layer of the big picture might not occur until a later time.
Anyway, I am so grateful to my friend Kim who let Em collect eggs from her hens last summer. Em knows that the reason the eggs aren't chicks is because they weren't fertilized by the rooster. This is something, biologically, she understands, yet without realizing there is the missing link of HOW the rooster actually carries out fertilization...so, we are going to go from there, relating that mommy has eggs and daddy has the 'fertilizer' component, using the official biological terms.
I'll give an update in case any other parent is nervous about this conversation. Jason and I are very much on the same page about educating Emily about the facts first instead of Em learning really stupid things from her peers on the playground. Also, we want Emily to be taught the truth, God's truth, and WE ARE RESPONSIBLE AS HER PARENTS TO DO THAT, not relying on the school system to do so. Ridley likened kids to sponges...they soak up all sorts of things that they see and hear and once they are full, when we finally try to teach them something important (like waiting until their junior high friends have already told them dumb stuff and experimentation may have already occurred), they get squeemish at the thought of talking about sex to their parents...EEEEWWWWW, HOW EMBARRASSING...the very people who should have empowered them with God's truth in the first place.
Ridley recommends peeling off layers of the conversation by beginning with the facts, plain and simple, always bringing it back to your family mission statement, and then, 1 to 2 years prior to puberty, the same sex respective parent takes the kid on a special little retreat or all day outing where you actually do talk about the more in depth topics, like fears and dangers, the world's social expectations, including STD's, pregnancy, oral sex, dating, infertility because of STD's, all sorts of things...to prepare them for their future. She recommends drawing out a time line of life, like 90 years or so, and having your child dream and brainstorm about life goals and what things they desire to do when they grow up, putting those on the time line. Then, on a time line of 90 years, show them how short the time of adolescence is and then, share with them that those can all be things they pursue and succeed in, encouraging them that they are responsible for their decisions, and that some may or may not be able to come to fruition depending on choices made day to day, namely sexual choices.
Basically, if you are ever given the opportunity to listen to one of her teaching CD's or can hear her in person, I highly recommend taking the time to listen to Mary Flo Ridley's presentation.
As a mom, I have always desired to have this and every other area of life be an open door for my children to be able to talk to me. It is important that I not fearfully avoid the most important topics in life like God, faith, death, sex, hope, etc. because if I avoid them if I am uncomfortable with a specific question or topic, my children, who are designed by God to be curious and hungry to learn, will find that information elsewhere! They will! Sex isn't dirty. God made it. Yeah, God. He made sex and called it good. So, if you give pat answers to your children that 'We don't talk about that' or 'that's naughty', they will get the idea that it is wrong and bad. And, years down the road, what God intended to be beautiful inside marriage will be perverted along the way.
The world mocks Christians for abstinence education. I'm sad for the world for not realizing God made sex, called it good, designed it for marriage so life wouldn't have to be too complicated, yet provides Himself as our Comforter when it has broken our heart or shattered our dreams, knowing we are people of our own wills...because He restores. Teach your kids about the sex God designed...it will provide for the future great husbands and wives one day...
To be continued...
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